Addiction’s Science

I only knew how to run from my problems

Leaving with a puff of smoke

Addiction is one hell of a monster

When they saw me falling they ran the other way

Wheezing laughter follows me, my lungs are no longer the color of healthy

They only want it if it’s pretty

A couple months ago a girl from my hometown overdosed on heroin

Leaving parents mourning their baby hours into her 16th birthday

I hoped it would open up a conversation about addiction’s realities being a brain disorder rather than the common misthought that it was a moral failure

My friends and I spent our high school careers smoking under bleachers and in dugouts to soar with the clouds or to take away the edge even for 5 minutes

It could have been one of us dead first because no one was willing to treat the spirits haunting our heavy hearts

Mental illness and addiction go hand in hand and self medication was our only salvation when no one told us we weren’t the failures

We knew full well we could die because that’s what we wanted

We were failed in the lack of education on our illnesses leaving us splintered trying to leave the grip of addiction

The only way we knew how to cope with the lights in our brains going out

Leaving with thoughts of ditching this world for the afterparty that was the afterlife

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