Almost Was

To the  first girl I fell in love with-

You moved halfway across the country years ago

You probably thought I’d be dead by the end of that calendar year

From the sight of scars running up and down my thighs you caught glimpses of in the locker room

We were all filled with a sadness none of us knew how to escape

I haven’t spoken your name since you left

It use to spill out of my mouth as wine spilled into my veins

I got drunk off your laughter

I started smoking the year after you left

I guess you leaving left a new void – I don’t think I knew how in love with you I was

I didn’t get enough time to memorize the map of your eyes

How cliché is it that I wish I kissed you when I got the chance?

You use to steal my shirts in the locker room after gym class

I would wear yours home – I still have some I refuse to let go of

It would be killing the memory of you

It’s the last thing I have tying me to you

I hope you kept mine – I didn’t want to tell you that you left this town with my favorite shirt

It’s a little goofy I’m reminiscing about some shirts

I can’t love anyone the way I love you

You heard music in my silence

You loved the way I looked at the world

Would you still love me if you saw me now?







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